Sibling Rivalry: Help Your Kids Get Along

Sibling rivalry is the never ending competition or animosity that goes on between siblings. It happens to all of us, even in the very best of homes. Even though we know it’s common, it is very hard to listen to and can be really stressful.I know that it can get under my skin even when I am in the best of moods.

It’s important to remember that although fighting is normal, many times parents can exacerbate the problem. also know that although fighting is normal, we as parents can sometimes exacerbate the problem.

One of the ways that we do this is by using an accusing tone with them.

Arguing over the bathroom

“Why do you guys always have to fight over the bathroom? Mommy and I share a bathroom and we don’t fight. Why can’t you do the same thing?”

Fighting over your attention

“Why do you always have to fight over who sits on my lap? Why can’t you just take turns? This is too silly!

Doing their chores

Why can’t you just do what I tell you to do? You guys always complain. Each one of you say that you are the only one who has to do jobs around here. Now, how can that be true?!”

When we are dealing with kids and their siblings, we don’t want to condemn or blame. It is better if we help them focus on solutions to their problems instead. To do that we need to respectfully name the issue and ask them questions that will move them towards compromise and resolutions.

For example:

• You guys are having trouble figuring out how to share the bathroom. You both need to leave at 8 am. You don’t want to have to wake up earlier just for him and you want to be able to take as long as you want in the bathroom. You both don’t want to be rushed.  This is a tough problem. How can we figure something out?

• You both want my attention at the same time. You both want to sit on my lap. This is really tough. Two children and one lap, What can we do?

• It sounds like both of you don’t want to do your jobs. You both are feeling like you have to do too much. Each one of you feels that you have to do more than the other. How can we make this feel fair to both of you?

Moving children from fighting to peace takes a lot of effort. Seeing your kids come up with solutions to their problems makes it all worthwhile.

To help your kids get along and learn more great skills like these, grab my Sibling Rivalry 2.0 course today!